Originally, they didn't — not until they saw it in a movie.

Seriously. Get The Straight Dope.

Being the dad of a young girl, I watch my share of Nick, Disney etc.

Today we watched our first episode of iCarly. The show wasn't bad, and had a good message. However, Miranda Cosgrove needs a voice coach. Any time she speaks above a low volume level, her voice is scary harsh. She sounds like she's angry and stressed.

Someone help this kid, in case I have to watch this show again.

G.I. Joe's face came from a true American hero, Sgt. Mitchell Paige. Paige won the Medal of Honor for his actions on Guadalcanal, 65 years ago this week.

When Hasbro asked to use his likeness, his only condition was that G.I. Joe must always remain a United States Marine. Hollywood wants to make a live-action movie based on G.I. Joe, but they don't think it will sell well overseas, so they're going to call him "Action Man."

Making him a metrosexual isn't enough; apparently red-blooded American fighting men frighten overseas moviegoers, too…

"G.I. Joe is now a Brussels-based outfit that stands for Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity, an international co-ed force of operatives who use hi-tech equipment to battle Cobra, an evil organization headed by a double-crossing Scottish arms dealer."

Well, thank goodness the villain — no need to offend anyone by making our villains Arabs, Muslims, or foreign dictators of any stripe these days, though apparently Presbyterians who talk like Scottie on "Star Trek" are still OK — is a double-crossing arms dealer. Otherwise one might be tempted to conclude the geniuses at Paramount believe arms dealing itself is evil.

Read the whole story, by Vin Suprynowicz, at the Las Vegas Review Journal.

A recent Ovaltine commercial has two moms making Ovaltine for the neighborhood kids.

The ladies are attractive — until the very end when they actually offer the rich, chocolate drink to the kids. Their wide-eyed enthusiasm looks borderline psychotic. Makes me want to stick to Nestle's Quick.

Trueness mixed with teh funny.

IMAO: We've All Been Elisabeth Hasselbeck

Alec Baldwin's celebrated patience, understanding and intelligence are obvious in this tender message left for his 12 11-year-old daughter… NOT!

What a piece of crap he is. Hear him for yourself at  Hot Air.

I hope Kim Basinger has filed for a restraining order.

'Nuff said.

Melinda Doolittle's performance was her best I've seen, but Jordin Sparks was awesome. I think Jordin should win.

I didn't like Blake Lewis' performance, but the chicks here at Acme Manor did. They didn't like LaKisha Jones, but I thought she was OK. We all thought Phil Stacy didn't do very well, but Sanjaya Malakar was atrocious, as Simon should have said. The bandana was too high — it should have been over his mouth.

Hopefully, this is the week Sanjaya goes home; I can not see why people keep voting for him, unless they just want to see more of his naked-guitar-playing sister. Go see her at Hooters if you must, but vote for someone with talent.

Martina McBride was beautiful, of course. Looking forward to hearing her sing tomorrow night — love her voice, too.

I just mentioned a great essay that logically dismantles many of the left's favorite arguments and slogans; a follow-up post debunks many modern conspiracy theories. Included are

• The Moon Landing
• JFK's Assassination
• Chemtrails
• 9/11 Conspiracies, including
  • Fire Can't Melt Steel
  • Twin Towers Rigged to Implode
  • A Missile Hit the Pentagon, Not American Airlines Flight 77

A couple of quotes…

I know this is harsh, but I’m sick of watching the damage they are doing to this civilization: these people are, to a man, complete losers. Losers. They are desperate and sad people who need to believe in some dark secret to give meaning to their lives.

And…

[W]hat kind of moral universe do you have to inhabit to be able to believe that your own people – airline personnel, demolition experts, police and security forces, faked witnesses and all the rest – are capable of such a thing? How much hate for your own society do you have to carry in order to live in such a desolate and ridiculous mental hell? What psychoses must a mind be riddled with in order to negate what was perfectly obvious and instead believe a theory of such monumental fantasy? How much pure constant hatred does that take?

What, in short, is the miserable black hole of self-loathing that drives a person like Rosie O’Donnell and millions like her?

And finally…

[T]he 9/11 Truth crowd when confronted with the lunacy of their claims [responds] We’re just asking questions…

Well, in that vein I’d like to ask some questions myself. Is Michael Moore a serial pedophile? I’m just asking, and I’m sure a lot of my readers would just like to have some questions answered. I heard that Rosie O’Donell ate a baby at a Satanic Ritual once – is that true? Can you please provide the evidence that this did not in fact happen? Thanks. Who has murdered more hookers: Bill Maher or Charlie Sheen? Come on, you can’t tell me there’s no smoke there. I just want a possible explanation…

The essay is Seeing the Unseen, Part 2.

I missed the show, but highlights are at her website and the video is at HotAir.com. There's nothing there that makes me change my mind about what I wrote almost a year ago — Malik Z. Shabazz and Quanell X are extortionist thugs.

I've watched AI a couple times with my family this season, but this is the first time I really paid attention.

Jennifer Lopez was the guest, and Latino music was the genre. It's apparently hard to sing well if you haven't been doing it a while.

My wife and 11-year old daughter thought Blake Lewis was good, but I didn't think so. I thought Sanjaya Malakar picked a good song, but he was pitchy. The only one that I thought had any pizazz was Jordin Sparks, but she had enough for at least half the rest.

If I had to predict the winner based on tonight, it would definitely be Jordin Sparks. Who should go home? Sanjaya Malakar of course. Probably LaKisha Jones and Phil Stacey, too.

Not only is the left quantifiably more profane, they're vicious and heartless, to boot.

Instapunk has the details.

Marko explains why the gun is civilization.

Use this in conversation:

People who argue for the banning of arms ask for automatic rule by the young, the strong, and the many, and that's the exact opposite of a civilized society.

You Are a Smart American

You know a lot about US history, and you're opinions are probably well informed. Congratulations on bucking stereotypes. Now go show some foreigners how smart Americans can be.

Are You a Dumb American?

If you know a young lady who is desperate to look like a model, show her this brief movie. Not only is the model worked on by experts, she is actually Photoshopped! Her neck is elongated, her eyes are enlarged and her face is made slender.

Dove has the movie.  

The arrogance belongs to the liberals, and the blood is the price paid by the men and women in our military.

"It is arrogant to think that if other people just knew how well we thought of ourselves, they'd stop trying to kill us."

– Tiffy Gerhardt (Abby Brammell), The Unit, "Old Home Week"

A Different Christmas Poem

The embers glowed softly, and in their dim light,
I gazed round the room and I cherished the sight.
My wife was asleep, her head on my chest,
My daughter beside me, angelic in rest.
Outside the snow fell, a blanket of white,
Transforming the yard to a winter delight.
The sparkling lights in the tree I believe,
Completed the magic that was Christmas Eve.
My eyelids were heavy, my breathing was deep,
Secure and surrounded by love I would sleep.
In perfect contentment, or so it would seem,
So I slumbered, perhaps I started to dream.
The sound wasn't loud, and it wasn't too near,
But I opened my eyes when it tickled my ear.
Perhaps just a cough, I didn't quite know,
Then the sure sound of footsteps outside in the snow.
My soul gave a tremble, I struggled to hear,
And I crept to the door just to see who was near
Standing out in the cold and the dark of the night,
A lone figure stood, his face weary and tight.
A soldier, I puzzled, some twenty years old,
Perhaps a Marine, huddled here in the cold.
Alone in the dark, he looked up and smiled,
Standing watch over me, and my wife and my child.
"What are you doing?" I asked without fear,
"Come in this moment, it's freezing out here!
Put down your pack, brush the snow from your sleeve,
You should be at home on a cold Christmas Eve!"
For barely a moment I saw his eyes shift,
Away from the cold and the snow blown in drifts..
To the window that danced with a warm fire's light
Then he sighed and he said "Its really all right,
I'm out here by choice. I'm here every night.
It's my duty to stand at the front of the line,
That separates you from the darkest of times.
No one had to ask or beg or implore me,
I'm proud to stand here like my fathers before me.
My Gramps died at 'Pearl on a day in December,"
Then he sighed, "That's a Christmas 'Gram always remembers."
My dad stood his watch in the jungles of 'Nam',
And now it is my turn and so, here I am.
I've not seen my own son in more than a while,
But my wife sends me pictures, he's sure got her smile."
Then he bent and he carefully pulled from his bag,
The red, white, and blue… an American flag.
"I can live through the cold and the being alone,
Away from my family, my house and my home.
I can stand at my post through the rain and the sleet,
I can sleep in a foxhole with little to eat.
I can carry the weight of killing another,
Or lay down my life with my sister and brother,
Who stand at the front against any and all,
To ensure for all time that this flag will not fall."
"So go back inside," he said, "harbor no fright,
Your family is waiting and I'll be all right."
"But isn't there something I can do, at the least,
"Give you money," I asked, "or prepare you a feast?
It seems all too little for all that you've done,
For being away from your wife and your son."
Then his eye welled a tear that held no regret,
"Just tell us you love us, and never forget.
To fight for our rights back at home while we're gone,
To stand your own watch, no matter how long.
For when we come home, either standing or dead,
To know you remember we fought and we bled.
Is payment enough, and with that we will trust,
That we mattered to you as you mattered to us."

– unattributed 

William Shakespeare's witches in Macbeth had the famous lines:

Eye of newt, and toe of frog,
Wool of bat, and tongue of dog,
Adder's fork, and blind-worm's sting,
Lizard's leg, and owlet's wing,
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.

I couldn't find the nutritional information, but it sounds low-carb.

War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things. The decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feeling which thinks that nothing is worth war is much worse. The person who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which is more important than his own personal safety, is a miserable creature and has no chance of being free unless made and kept so by the exertions of better men than himself.

–John Stuart Mill

Given the right circumstances, liberal feminists, activist lawyers, and judges — who should be impeached for their lack of judgement — will first allow and then defend the cold-blooded shooting of an innocent child.

It happened. Read about it at Townhall.com: When Liberals Shoot Children.

In an earlier post, I explained the psychosis of Bush-hatred using the psychological term reaction formation — "behavior or emotion that is the polar opposite of the way someone is or should be feeling, because the authentic emotion is too frightening to deal with." I think it's also a good explanation of why some people hate guns, or are irrationally scared of them.

Many people believe the liberal notion that criminals become such for reasons almost completely outside their control. They believe that otherwise law-abiding people turn to crime because of poverty, lack of education, lack of opportunity, discrimination or other factors. And it's society's fault that this happened, because we didn't adequately address these wrongs.

Sometimes it's almost as if liberals wish to convey some sort of dignity to criminals. I remember talking to my cousin and his wife almost twenty years ago; my cousin was a parole officer in Dallas, and his job required face-to-face contact with dozens of parolees each week. I asked him if he carried a gun, and he seemed shocked at the idea. His wife said, "But it might make them mad if they knew he had a gun." It took me a while to decipher her response; she was essentially saying that the parolees had a right to be indignant if they found that that they weren't explicitly trusted. It wasn't their fault they were convicted criminals, and they were fine now, unless society failed them again. And if my cousin carried a gun because some of them had been violent in the past, well, he was failing them.

It's true that many people make a series of bad choices due to bad experiences, and if helped, they turn their lives around. Christian prison ministries prove that daily. But these changes take time – they don't happen instantly. Despite that, many of the anti-gun crowd also insist that we not resist when attacked, I suppose in hope that it will make the attacker rethink his whole life on the spot, and go home and pick daisies.

An even more radical offshoot of this philosophy is that many people commit crimes that wouldn't otherwise, just because they had access to a gun. 

So liberals have the idea that no one is inherently bad, and it's our fault when they are, either by failing them as a society or by leaving guns laying around. It's a warm, fuzzy little idea, and gives the impression that if we just do the right things, no one will do bad things. 

The reality is the opposite: some people are just bad. Just because we can trace the circumstances and decisions that lead them to become bad doesn't mean that if we are nice to them that they will become nice.

Apparently that reality is so frightening or abhorrent that many people subconsciously decide to fear and/or hate the concept of self-defense and the most effective means to that defense, a personal firearm.

The good news is that this psychosis can be "unlearned." Sometimes it happens just by an honest evaluation of facts. Other times it's because someone introduces them to the sport of shooting, and they find out that guns are actually enjoyable. Sadly, sometimes it's because of personal experience with violent crime.

If gunowners will introduce as many people as possible to lawful enjoyment of firearms, we can reduce violent crime. That's a fact.

This isn't new; actually it's over a year old, but it's still funny.

Wuzzadem presents Oprah: The Humiliation and Degradation of the Drive-Thru.

A good credo for anyone, man or woman, prompted by the Montreal college shooting.

I believe Tamara when she says "I ain't goin' out like that…" 

Over the next few days, my family will be praying for the family and friends of Ruth Sheila Lapin.

Ruth was a resident of East Windsor, NJ, and was 53 years old when she was killed by terrorists at the World Trade Center on September 11, 2001. She was a senior business analyst at Baseline Financial Services.

From one of her friends: "Ruth knew how to have a good time. She appreciated the power of a witty remark and a good laugh. She had a unique spirit that doesn't come along frequently and a deep love for her children. Ruth was a person who left a lasting impression on you. She enjoyed her life."

Rest in peace, Ruth - we will never forget. 

The 2996 Project

Checking my logs, I find that lots of people are interested in confessed killer John Mark Karr's mullet.

They're finding it at this post. I'm trying to remember if any other accused/convicted murderer sported such a hideous coif. 

Any ideas? Post 'em in the comments. 

Inspiring -

Farrah Gray began contributing to his family’s financial support at the age of 6, and he made his first million by the time he was 14. His success made a lot of people change their thinking about where life in the projects of Chicago’s South Side could lead. 

Business Opportunities Weblog — Want To Be A Millionaire, Ask Yourself Three Questions

Here's the famous "Whiskey Speech," delivered by Noah S. "Soggy" Sweat in the Mississippi House in 1952 when lawmakers were debating legalizing liquor.

Liquor was illegal in Mississippi. But the state collected what was called a "black market" tax on it totaling millions of dollars.

Sweat, who was elected to the House in 1947 at the age of 24, served one term and delivered the speech during his last year in office. It is considered the classic example of political doublespeak.

My friends,

I had not intended to discuss this controversial subject at this particular time. However, I want you to know that I do not shun controversy. On the contrary, I will take a stand on any issue at any time, regardless of how fraught with controversy it might be. You have asked me how I feel about whiskey. All right, here is how I feel about whiskey.

If when you say whiskey you mean the devil's brew, the poison scourge, the bloody monster, that defiles innocence, dethrones reason, destroys the home, creates misery and poverty, yea, literally takes the bread from the mouths of little children; if you mean the evil drink that topples the Christian man and woman from the pinnacle of righteous, gracious living into the bottomless pit of degradation, and despair, and shame and helplessness, and hopelessness, then certainly I am against it.

But;

If when you say whiskey you mean the oil of conversation, the philosophic wine, the ale that is consumed when good fellows get together, that puts a song in their hearts and laughter on their lips, and the warm glow of contentment in their eyes; if you mean Christmas cheer; if you mean the stimulating drink that puts the spring in the old gentleman's step on a frosty, crispy morning; if you mean the drink which enables a man to magnify his joy, and his happiness, and to forget, if only for a little while, life's great tragedies, and heartaches, and sorrows; if you mean that drink, the sale of which pours into our treasuries untold millions of dollars, which are used to provide tender care for our little crippled children, our blind, our deaf, our dumb, our pitiful aged and infirm; to build highways and hospitals and schools, then certainly I am for it.

This is my stand. I will not retreat from it. I will not compromise.

I find myself in complete agreement.

I don't get to watch the news as much as I used to, but I get the impression Quanell X, Malik Z. Shabazz, and The New Black Panther Party are up to something.

A decent percentage of my traffic comes from Google searches, and many of those from searches for Quanell X. The searches lead to this post where I tried to figure out X's and Shabazz's appearance on The O'Reilly Factor a while back.

Today I decided to look around a little, and found one blogger who noted Quanell X is a "black supremacist," and "has publicly expressed his blind hatred of white people and one time directed his followers to go into the River Oaks section of Houston and mug whites at random in retaliation for the execution of convicted murderer Gary Graham."

I also read that Quanell X, who claims that blacks are a people that have lost their culture, is married to an Asian woman! While there is absolutely nothing wrong with this, it seems radically out of character. In fact, he apparently keeps his marriage a secret, lending credence to my position in my original post — and shared by countless others, if Google is any indication — that it's all about the money.

Check with Queen Mama for more details about the marriage. 

It has been suggested that reinstating the military draft would make the war on terror more "real" to the average American, apparently by getting a larger number of kids raised by liberals into the armed forces. This is a really weird offshoot of diversity.

Thomas Sowell's latest column explores the results of instituting a draft by contrasting draftees from WWII and modern hypothetical draftees: 

Back in the days of World War II, the military were drafting young men who were, by and large, patriotic Americans, people who felt that they had a duty to protect this country from its enemies.

Today, a military draft would bring in large numbers of people who have been systematically "educated" to believe the worst about this country or, at best, to be non-judgmental about the differences between American society and its enemies.

The fact that we could use a larger army of the kinds of people who have already volunteered to put their lives on the line does not mean that we can get it by adding warm bodies fresh from our politically correct schools and colleges, where standards and self-discipline are greatly lacking.

Just getting such people used to the idea of duty and discipline could be a major drain on the military, not to mention a plague of lawsuits from groups like the American Civil Liberties Union if the little darlings were not handled with kid gloves.

He has a good reason for leaving things as they are:

…so many American institutions, from the Congress to the courts, have degenerated into irresponsible self-indulgence that the military is one of the very few institutions left with a sense of purpose for which it is prepared to make sacrifices.

We dare not destroy that institution, or undermine its morale, by pouring into it very different kinds of people, who will be like sand poured into the gears of machinery.

He does have a suggestion, though –

This is not to say that there are no civilians who would be valuable additions to the military. Such people need not be drafted. Our colleges are blocking such people from taking R.O.T.C. by not allowing R.O.T.C. programs or military recruiters on campus in the first place.

Anti-military academics think they have a right to over-ride their students' rights to reach their own conclusions and make their own decisions, or even to hear a different viewpoint about the military.

Patriotic and educated young Americans who want to serve in the military are available. We need to stop academia from sabotaging national defense by blocking them from R.O.T.C. and from even hearing what military representatives have to say.

Read more at Townhall.com. 

This got TIVO'd (actually, Dish PVR'd), and though I watched it when it was new in 2004, I decided to watch it again.

Touching, gripping… Donald P. Bellisario came up with a winner with this series, and this is one of the best episodes. 

"Navy NCIS: Naval Criminal Investigative Service" Call of Silence (2004)