This quote might be Frank J's greatest single contribution to mankind.

Read it in context so you can explain it to liberals:

IMAO: The Country Needs a Punch to the Face

Tomorrow is Scottish Day. It’s the big Scottish Day Parade. And you know what that means. Bagpipes. I was thinking about this, and I said to myself, well hell, if I want to hear a shrill bag of wind, I’ll just watch "The View.”
– Letterman, Friday April 13th

There are only three ages for women in Hollywood — Babe, District Attorney, and Driving Miss Daisy.
– Goldie Hawn

My mom told me this story, told to her and witnessed by her dad: Several people were in a cafe, when an obviously drunken man walked in and quickly made an ass of himself. A well-dressed man, bigger than the drunk, approached him and, leaning in close, spoke quietly for several seconds. The drunk's expression changed from belligerence to confusion, and he walked out the door. My grandfather asked the well-dressed man what he told the drunk to make him settle down and leave, and the well-dressed man said, "I didn't tell him anything, really; I just recited Jabberwocky."

Herewith, for your edification, one of the greatest nonsense poems written in the English language.

Jabberwocky
from Through the Looking-Glass, and What Alice Found There
by Lewis Carroll

'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

'Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!'

He took his vorpal sword in hand:
Long time the manxome foe he sought–
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
And stood awhile in thought.

And as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!

One, two! One, two! And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.

'And hast thou slain the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!'
He chortled in his joy.

'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

William Shakespeare's witches in Macbeth had the famous lines:

Eye of newt, and toe of frog,
Wool of bat, and tongue of dog,
Adder's fork, and blind-worm's sting,
Lizard's leg, and owlet's wing,
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.

I couldn't find the nutritional information, but it sounds low-carb.